Rich Wilhelm

Oh, What a Week That Was

In family, fatherhood, high school on June 11, 2016 at 10:43 am

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Our dog Jolie woke me up about 35 minutes ago, asking in a noisy and impolite way for a walk. I threw on the nearest clothes at hand and we set out. It was not even 5:30 in the morning.

Since I was wearing yesterday’s work clothes, I felt like I was on a dogwalk of shame, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized I didn’t really have to be ashamed of much. I had made it through the week that I had been contemplating for months.

Our younger son Chris was promoted from middle school to high school this week. Our older son Jimmy graduated from high school two days later.

Oh, what a week it was. And, now that it’s over, I feel like I am a just-slightly-different person from when it began.

I began this week overwhelmed with emotion, and with a very practical list of things that simply had to be done before the first notes of “Pomp and Circumstance” played. I began this week thinking about how I’d handle the tangle of widely-varied emotions I’ve been feeling for months about all of this.

In short, I began this week thinking about myself. A big mistake, since this week clearly wasn’t about me, and it’s that realization that is making me that just-slightly-different person.

As the week progressed, things fell into place as best they could. Certain tasks were completed, others weren’t. But the ceremonies — Chris’ promotion, Jimmy’s baccalaureate, followed by his graduation the next night — all proceeded beautifully. The post-event celebrations each night — dinner at Hibachi on Wednesday, a visit to Dunkin’ Donuts on Thursday and cake and ice cream at home last night — all turned out just about right. Donna’s mom has been with us all week and my mom and sister drove up three nights in a row to be with us. I thought about my dad a bit, and how much I wish he could have been here, but his spirit was here each time someone remarked how much Jimmy resembles Dad now (right down to his stoic photo op smiles). Plus, I wore one of Dad’s ties to graduation.

It wasn’t a perfect week. But it was a really, really good week. And it was all about Jimmy and Chris. And when Jimmy’s graduation ceremony finally arrived, I wasn’t bogged down with all of the emotional baggage that’s been weighing me down for months. I simply felt happy for Jim and not particularly sentimental about the fact that his life — and mine — will be changing as a result of this particular ceremony. Best to embrace the change, enjoy the moment and move forward.

But it was also a week about family. During last night’s cake and ice cream party, the power briefly went out in our house, which sent Chris (and, I’ll admit it, me) into momentary emotional tailspins. At one point in this [non] crisis, Chris wailed that it could be the “worst night ever.”

This led to a long and funny conversation about some of the previously “worst nights ever” our family has experienced, going all the way back to 1975. We laughed long and hard as each of the stories unfolded. Laughing at the long ago worst nights ever, while reveling in the current imperfect but nonetheless beautiful moment? That sounds like family to me.

 

 

 

 

 

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  1. Always remember the wisdom of Garrison Keillor: “Nothing bad ever happens to a writer. It’s all material”.

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Patrick F. O'Donnell

writer, editor, general wordsmith and scribe

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